Will She Love Again?

It's been months since the Academy Awards, the fateful blissful parade of a star couple, which then was scandalized with scorn, infidelity, and betrayal. Sandra Bullock's love life which had always been in the low, was supposedly laced with sugar,spice and all things nice. So when Jesse James joined the Hollywood roll call list of husbands that could not keep their "shlongs" in their pants, the question which is still making headlines is, "Will she ever love again?"

Let's break away from Hollywood and look into the real world. Although Hollywood's lifestyle sometimes seem surreal, with the lives of stars as a movie of it's own, I've heard this question making its rounds amongst my girlfriends a million times before. Every time someone breaks up and is in the process of healing, she is always bombarded with friends who are forcing her to move on, to love again! Because, as helpful and caring as we are, a breakup is always a source of drama, predicting the series of events that will take place, gives some of us who thrive on gossip a wee little orgasm.

On the contrary, I believe that the question of whether someone will ever love again, is really over-rated or far less important than many other issues which needs to be ironed out in the aftermath of a break-up. Forcing that question down a jilted person's throat, is not going to do her any good. In fact, because this question is a staple question for any break-up, we have planted it in the heads of women that the true meaning of surviving a breakup is being able to find another person to share their lives and dreams with.

 What happened to appreciating the little things in life which have made an impact on us? What happened to acknowledging the changes that have made you a better person which you might have supposedly learned from the jerk that dumped u over Miss Size Zero.? What happened to making a mistake, and learning something good out of it? What happened to NOT making the same mistakes again?

The thing is, as much as the healthiest way to cope with a break up is to move on, it's not really healthy is it when you move "back on track". For example, dated a junkie, found out he loves his heroin more than you. Moved on to, "Dating a married man, because things might take a turn". Rather than bouncing back on track, wouldn't it be better if people were given time to grieve, settle the unsettled issues pertaining to the break up, bad choices, bad decisions, and then move on to greener juicier pastures?

I hate the fact that women appear to be vulnerable when really, they are not. For Christ sake, we're made for knife slashing period cramps, pregnancy, labor all of which is undoubtedly more painful than a break up. So telling me that a woman can endure Brazilian waxing, and yet not strong enough to be independent off men, is utter bullshit.

In my opinion, women think that finding true love is their ultimate lifelong goal because we are taught to think that way. An independent woman is always scorned for being too egoistic, or sour grapes. But truth is, woman, are just as capable as men when it comes to being on their own, and finding love in their own time. Screw the biological clock. Screw the "I'm getting older hence I better settle for whatever" theory.

Sandra Bullock can be picky over her next man for as long as she wants to. And if she intends not to, let's not judge her. Because a little of her, is in all of us. Wasting your time thinking about will you ever love again, might lead you back to where you started off wrong in the first place. Is desperation really worth it?