I Did Not Vote...

I woke up this "morning" way past morning... Last night i had an adrenaline pumping time awaiting the final mandate on whether our ruling party for 50 odd years will maintain their power. It was only until last night that i realised what a lousy citizen i was. I sat there, waiting to see if the rakyats would be strong and brave enough to embrace a change, waiting to see if the rakyats have had enough of corruption and unkept promises, waiting to see if all the woes and lamentations on Malaysiakini would translate into votes to hope for a better future for our country. As i braced through the hours of awaiting the results of the hot contested areas, a pang of guilt swept through me. I wished i registered to be a voter, i wished i did vote.

Disclaimer: I did not register for three reasons. Firstly, i did not want to go back all the way to Ulu Tiram, Johor Bahru to vote, as my Identity card address will determine the location of my vote, It was of course a hassle, so i chose to take the easy way out. Secondly, I felt my one vote would hardly make a difference to the majority vote, of course i guiltily confess that was shallow thinking. Thirdly, i told people i did not know who to vote for because i've yet to see a "party" that has won my heart and mind and i didn't want to mindlessly vote just for the sake of voting. Truth being told, i already knew who i wanted to vote for. Truth being told, i came from a less than middle income class family since i was born and that has barely changed, so of course i knew who i wanted to vote for! Truth being told, i could only have been too blind or deaf if i believed wht i said because of all the emails and articles that i've been bombarded with should help me make my decision. Truth being told, i just did not want to fulfill my obligations and that, i regret deeply because i have just included myself in the typical Malaysian Group which i have repeatedly scorned by having this "Tidak Apa Attitude"

I'm of course ashamed of myself. The changes in our election polls yesterday gave me new hope for this country and i wished i had been part of it. And to all the Malaysian Voters out there who fulfilled their obligations and rights, i applaud you. It is easy to sit by and just wait for a change but you guys did what you knew was right. Many out there (like me) chose to leave this responsibility to you and because you fulfilled it, we will have hope for tomorrow. So thank you very much, for voting from your minds, and not your heart.

I had a life where everything good that came by me was an opportunity i must consider myself blessed with. All the good things like my education, my identity, my job, were opportunities but not something i could have worked my way through if i wanted because our country created too little opportunity for education especially to the minorities. My parents sacrificed for me and That's how i got to where i am today. I'm not a great achiever, and neither am i an underachiever .... I am an Average citizen, and average individual. Am i Happy with this? Not really. I'd like to play the blaming game here. If my family had money, things would be different, If i had the chance to pursue the education i dreamt of, things would be different again. But things are so which that the most important determining factor of changing one's fate is so scarce in our country. I'm still bitterup till today that i didn't get to do medicine. Because i either had to be insanely rich or insanely intelligent because i'm a minority, Which by the way, i'm neither. Yesterday during the election poles discussion on TV3, a professor, (which in my opinion was farrrrrrrrrrr from bright) said that the reason DAP won was because the middle class income group voted for them. He had such a haughty air by saying this as though it's a statement to be proud of that our government was not at risk by the voting phenomenon. What he said was utterly true! It is true that perhaps the opposition won is because the middle class income group voted for them. The low income group voted for our rulling party because they probably were scared that a change would make them lose what they already had which was so scarce, and the high income group voted for our rulling party because they were afraid to lose their privileges and their wealth. And this is because, the middle class group is sick and tired of being middle class generations after generations. Because these are the people i can truly relate to and understand that it's time we need a change. The middle class are probably the biggest sufferers in this country. We're stagnated. We're not starving and suffering physically, but we are suffering emotionally and hungry for a hope that through our hard work and persistence we want to see our lives improving. Just because we have enough, it doesn't mean we're fine with it. The human race cannot progress with enough. The human race can only progress with changes. And because we're the middle class middle income group, we want to see a progress for our personal growth. So, yesterday was a time when the middle class group stood up, woke up, and decided it's time we choose to progress and not blindly wait for someone to allow us to progress.

We cannot say for sure that this change will bring a significant change in the quality of our lifestyle, but we can say for sure now that we chose to give the others a chance to address our woes. We Malaysians Gave ourselves a chance. :)
And please, Pat yourselves on your backs for voting. For once, I'm proud to be Malaysian and i assure you that wherever i am for the rest of my life, I will fulfill my voting obligations next General Elections Onwards.

-cheers-