When you do say "I Love You"

It is said that the phrase " i love you" is one of the most common phase people use in the English language. However, research also shows that "ilove you" is more commonly used among friends and strangers rather than among family, spouses, or partners.. Why is such an intimate profession of feeling uttered more often to people whom you don't really have that sort of emotional attachment to rather than to people who you truly care, appreciate and Love?

Saying "i love you" to someone dear to your heart is a moment of weakening. It is a moment where you are informing the person that your life has been changed by the latter and that you need him/her for your emotional well being. It is also a moment of caving in to emotions and weakening of your indepedence of self. When people say i love you to people who matter to them, it's a moment where their most fragile self shows.

The most feared part of saying "i love you" to someone special is when there is no recipocration of the phrase or a delayed reaction of the phrase. It is no wonder that when the other person does not say " i love you too", tension and frustration can occur.

So when do we say "i love you" and mean it? Through some chats with my girlfriends yesterday, i realised that this question is harder than it looks. There are so many aspects and different stands on when and where to say "i love you", especially for the first time. I used to think that there is a clear cut answer, but i realised, it really depends on the person's personality and principles. There is no answer to when you should say "i love you" to a person. It is more abou the moment, the timing, the place you are in your relationship, and the future you see or do not see. It is hardly fair to tell someone " now is the right time tosay it" because each person is different, and what works for me, may not work for others.

For my relationship, saying " i love you " for the very first time was awkward too. I was the one to drop the bomb and 4 months later, i received back my recipocration. When i said " i love you" for the first time, i felt stupid, vulnerable, and i wished i could turn back that bloody 3 seconds. It wasn't a rehearsed " i love you" on top of it. It was a blurt out which my vocal chords had betrayed me before my mind could process the consequences of saying that three deadly words. I never uttered that three words again until my response and recipocration came along.

So bubu, i may have been wrong when i was trying to figure out the perfect time for you to say those words. You will know when it comes for sure. :)