Our Story

It's been 4 days and i've been wondering how to piece the words together. 24th November marked my third year anniversary with Bernard. There were so many things i wanted to write about, so much of details i want to share with the world, but i couldn't find the time to sit down and do it. Now that i have half an hour before my next meeting. I shall do our story justice.

Everyone has that "ultimate" love story. The type where it still makes you swoon even when you think about it 20 years down the road. The type where

 you would look back with no regrets despite the blood, sweat, tears included in the concoction of memories surrounding the relationship. 

Bernard and me had a fairytale story. If i had to put down every last details of the past 4 and half years i've known him, it would make a fantastic best seller romance novel ( too bad i don't read those genre, let alone write it) 

We met at a Sarah Brightman concert. I was there working as an usher to earn peanuts to get through my pathetic life as a student, and he was there as an usher too as a favor to his friend and to beat the summer holidays blue ( he was back from chicago for a 3 months holiday). Out of what was close to 50 over ushers, we met, we chat, we became instant friends. And out of a twist of fate, he was stationed right next to me in the big stadium.

I was going through a topsy turvy turn in my life, being out of a long relationship, having problems with friends who turned their backs on me, 

moving into a new place, and dating numerous Not-so-nice-bastards, he was a breath of fresh air. I didn't see him as an object of attraction, but rather, as a friend who was insanely charming. Throughout a concert where people paid thousands to watch and be in platinum seats, bernard and me spent the entire night chatting away. 

At the end of the night when it was time to say goodbye, i kissed him on his cheeks goodbye, and dismissed the possibility of ever meeting him again, or keeping in touch. It was too good to be true i told myself. He was just a friend. I spent the entire night tossing and turning in bed. My head was replaying every small conversation we had, and all i could think of was this guy whom i vaguely knew, and who meant nothing more to me than just a acquaintance. I tried to dismiss all those thoughts and forced myself to sleep.

The very next morning, i woke up with a smile on my face when i looked at my phone. Bernard messaged me a simple message just telling me how his day started. That, was the start to something beautiful, i just knew it. We exchanged messages every day, and one day, we finally went out for a dinner date. We chatted the whole night away, accidentally wore the same color top and jeans, and felt even closer to each another. Immediately, i dropped everyone around me, i was desperate to get rid of my past, and enjoy this breath of fresh air.

After 3 weeks, and numerous outings, Bernard finally kissed me. And for the first time in my entire life, i knew what it felt like to have butterflies in my stomach. Time flew past for the 3 months Bernard was around, and it was time to say goodbye to each another as he had to go back to chicago for the next term. I remember the night i cried myself to sleep. Perhaps more because i was reverberating myself for falling into this kind of situation! I was confused just as he was. On the day he was flying off, he sent me to college, i said my goodbyes, and hugged him goodbye. I was determined not to let him see me cry. I told him i loved him, as if the words just came out naturally, i didn't feel stupid, but neither did i expect my lips to betray me. 

The next few days were filled with remorse, confusion and fear. We never got together, there were no promises, but neither did it end. And it scared me that my life would get back to the normal disaster that it was, i finally saw him online, and he seemed fine, and he told me to forget him. I was devastated, but i refused to act or show that i was. 

For one and half years, things yo- yoed between us. We talked to each another almost every night and day, i called him, he called me, we were constantly on line. People came in and out of our lives but we still found ourselves together via a cable, millions of mile apart. I could not move on though options seemed to overflow me. And that feeling that i loved him didn't go away, it just grew to such enormity that i constantly felt like i couldn't breathe. Bernard sent me surprise bouquets at my door. We sang to each another birthday tunes on the phone. We cried together, laughed together, ranted together, tried to give up on each another together, but nothing broke the bond we had. 

After one and half years, bernard was offered a permanent job in chicago. He gave it up for me, and he came home. The moment he arrived, i remember running towards him in the most unkept manner, in my jammies, hair all tied up. I couldn't sleep for the 3 days he was on flight, simply fearful of him changing his mind and not feeling the same for me once he had seen me face to face. On the very same day he arrived, while lying next to each another, i asked him if he regretted coming back for me. And the only answer he gave me was that the only thing he regretted is not asking me to be his girlfriend sooner. And from then on, we became exclusive of each another. 

Through the three years, we went through many trials. There were times we needed to have time outs, there were times we almost broke up, we realised we were two very different people who had more compromising than sharing to do. Life was not a cupcake. But we never gave up. Maybe because of all the time we spent trying to make it work, it just didn't seem worth it to gve up. But maybe also because neither of us would give up because we loved each another too much. 

It has finally reached 3 years now of officially being together. And being with bernard is the best decision i have ever made in my life. We do not hold hands, and do much PDA, but everyday, the love just grows stronger. 

He is my pillar, my friend, my lover, my confidante, my past, present and future. And i am glad that with each anniversary that we celebrate, we can look forward for more years to come. :)

I love you baby... 

Ratheega and Alvin's big night!

Last weekend was Rathee's wedding. Boy it was fun. It seemed a bit surreal to see my best friend getting married. But i made sure i was involved heavily in order to start getting the real feeling of her getting married. Here are some pics of the big night!

Make up at MAC

Halfway through the makeover- already ravishing

Au Naturel and glowing

A cinderella story. AWWww

Photo-whoring with the bride

Cam-whoring with the groom

The classic beautiful pose and gown

Dry Ice! Dry ICe! Alert! They can't see where they're going.

The flower baby

The backdrop

Me and Ng, another one of my bestie!

Old classmates reunion chatting merrily

I cannot pose properly to save my life. The class of 2000

Mami and Papa at the wedding

"can't take my eyes off you" -*croons*

Me yanking on the bride's hair!

Banghra moves for a chinese dinner....HMmmmmM

The City of Hell-Drivers

I spent the last three days in jb zooming here and there running errands and attending one of the most important days of my best friend’s life. Rathee, your wedding was such a wonderful event. I loved every moment of fussing around with your dress, make-up and hair. Congratulations, you did not faint during your speech! J

However, besides the wonderful event that made my weekend priceless, I resented every moment spent on the streets and being stuck in traffic in jb. Somehow, jb reminded me a lot of Jakarta, where the air is constantly grey, where you get a sinus attack should you wind down your windows while you drive and the attitude of people constantly trying to cheat you because they assume you can’t speak the language.

While I never noticed all these things despite being born and bred in this city, it’s either that I was sucked into being a Johorian myself, or that things have definitely changed over the years.

These are a few things I absolutely hate about jb;

1.     There is no darn traffic system. Lorries and busses take up all three lanes and speed like no man’s business. They even race with cars who overtake them
   
2.    The road system sucks. Three lanes suddenly become two without any road markings or warning. There are hardly any signboards to aid directions.
   
3.  Dirty fumes. We are not even talking bout being environmentally friendly and green. The black fumes bigger vehicles emit are downright pollution! What the hell is Puspakom for? And with IRDA coming up ( a new multimedia super corridor area likened to cyberjaya), you would think they would like to start cleaning up the area.
   
4. Crime rates and road rage. People drive without sticking to their lanes or giving indications that they would be switching lanes. And since there is no motorcycle lane, there are motorcycles zooming in and out of anywhere as if they have nine lives. There are plenty of people out there who make a living out of purposely getting into an accident and extorting compensation afterwards.
   
5.  The roads are shit. There are pot-holes every damn where on every damn road. Even land-cruisers will have their absorbers spoilt in no time.
   
6. People are DUH. People in jb bring unfriendliness to the next level. No one would give you directions if you are lost. If you look different or out of town, they stare at you blatantly. Subtlety does not exist in this city.
   

oh well, I'm glad i'm back in KL. As much as i don't find KL any more pleasant than JB, i'd rather be here!

People say I'm BLAH!

Last night, i spoke to my mum on the phone. As we were talking, she casually slipped in the topic of my blog. Apparently, my mother knew i had a blog although she hasn't read it! Amazing how news travel.

My mother conspicuously added that some people felt my blog was filthy and controversial. Although She didn't name NAMES, i could have guessed who said what.

My blog is not a suitable reading material for those who relish in total denial and those faint of the heart on controversial topics. So therefore, if you fall under the those categories, please refrain from reading my blog. If you need to comment, then do it so on the blog. I welcome all comments. Rather than to gossip behind my back because that it so not cool. 

While some do enjoy my blog, it is totally understandable that some people might totally hate it. We are humans, we ARE entitled to different opinions in life. 

Where the Hell is Matt?

I came across this video of a guy who travelled to 42 countries in 14 months in the making of a video. To me, this video portrayed that people across continents and culture can be united under a single element. Fact is, you can find many other messages in this video as you deem fit!

THIS is probably the most awesome video i've watched. take a look. It's amazing!

where the hell is matt

My best friend's wedding

Next Sunday is my best friend's wedding. A friend i journeyed through since we were 5. It was not always merry and play for us. We used to pinch hit and scream at each another, but she is the one person i found myself stuck to till now. She is undoubtedly, my best friend. 

While she is going through a rough time now preparing for her wedding and trying hard to endure all the trials and obstacles, and while i am not there physically to comfort her and help her through, i can only wish her my very best and be there for her through the phone. 

Interracial marriages are very common these days. In fact, it is so common that majority of Malaysians come from a stock of mixtures. It is hard to find many families who have had a mono-linage of one race. Well, interracial marriages are sa

id to produce some of the better looking generations in Malaysia! Haha.. 

However, when two strong racial groups come along to agree on ONE big day, there's where the headache comes in. For My bestfriend's case, her husband to be is a chinese from a traditional chinese family and she, herself is from a traditional Indian family. Not only does she have to go through religious issues, but also tradition and culture issues. Her dad wanted to put a "Lord Ganesh Statue" in front of the stage of her chinese wedding. Her mother-in-law-to-be wanted to put up a "Guanyin Statue". Buffet was opted for a Chinese wedding instead of the usual 10 course dinner because of the extensive menu requested by both sides of the folks. There will be a chinese tea ceremony, an Hindu blessing ceremony, "laddus"(indian ghee ball sweets), champagne, Sarees, cheongsams, and many other mixed and match

 traditional practices to soothe the egos of both sides of the folks. What does the bride and groom really want? A simple garden wedding with a small crowd of guests consisting of people who really mattered. Thats the one thing that WILL BE absent from the wedding. 

When a couple decides to take those holy vows, who's really merging? The two individuals or the marriage between two families. As much as parents are extremely excited and happy when their children get married, most of them get carried away being involved in the preparations of the big day. Wedding is suppose to be a joyous occasion, yet research shows that Couples fight more during wedding preparations compared to the whole duration of the dating period. Parents want to impress their friends and family, and many forget to remember the fact that it is NOT their big day, but the big day of their children. 

Sure, they have sacrificed their whole lives for their children, but in my opinion, it does not cut them any slack of making unreasonable demands of the "must-haves" during their children's once in a lifetime biggest moment, especially when it's at the expense of their children's convenience. 

Good luck Rahtee, I will be there on your Big day to celebrate the biggest day of both your lives and i hope i don't end up crying! =)

Early Christmas Spirit

It is November and my Christmas tree is already up! Some say its too early but i guess it's never too early to bask in Christmas joy.

Two days ago, Kathy and me did some major spring Cleaning. Since we decided to foster a kitten Eddy found on the street before we found a good home for it, the house has been in a bigger mess than ever! On top of that, my clothes are perpetually lying on the two seater couch because i just could never find the time to fold them up neatly in my cupboard. Bless my housemates for putting up with me!

Anyhoos, we decided to put up the christmas tree. As we took out the tree box, trimmings and lights, we treated ourselves to some cream liquor, while christmas carols were joyously blasting from the speaker in the hall.

Here are some pictures of our two additional helpers in putting up the christmas tree!

The Final Product!

Mistletoe piggy

Kitty in action

Perfect Family

Piggy's way of showing love

Kathy the human christmas tree

It is always great fun to relinquish on early Christmas cheers! Hope you guys are in the midst of putting up your trees too!

It took them over Two centuries

The change the world had anticipated all year has finally happened. America, has finally earned the right of calling herself the land of all possibilities. 

A black + white, muslim named president. Something, the world had not anticipated, and in secret, neither did Americans. But somehow, it just happened. And the world has never been more proud of Americans than they have been today!

I'm sure they'll be thousands of blogs up today on their views of the biggest American elections in history. So i will not waste time to try to even sound as if i've been an ardent follower and pretend to know bollocks bout it. 

 All i know is, it took Americans 232 years to realise it is not a national threat to have a black president. It took them that long to realise that preserving white sovereignity is of secondary importance compared to equal rights. Americans have finally realised that it is not whether or not Obama will do a better job than McCain, but it is important sometimes to just have faith, and embrace changes that may or may not happen. 

Question is, if it took 232 years for America to embrace a change, how long will it take us? What more especially when we have three, and not two majority races which makes up Malaysia?

We are not even talking about a Chinese or Indian prime minister. We can't even accept a new party for pete's sake. We have a long long way to go and we well deserve to be a third world country still in any given situation. 

YOU ROCK OBAMA!!!

Kejap ini.. Kejap itu...Make up your mind!

On a beautiful sunday morning where most people laze in bed and wake up only during noon, i woke up at 7.30am to get ready for a VCT training i had to attend! (VCT stands for voluntary counseling and testing for HIV) 

As usual, i went down to the cafe below my apartment and started off my day in the most normal fashion with a cup of coffee and my daily dose of Malaysian humor via the Sunday times. As I browsed through the first ten pages of the newspaper, i couldn't decide if i wanted to laugh, cry, or rage at what i was reading.

A couple of stories caught my attention.

story 1

The National Fatwa council is deciding on ruling to ban yoga for all muslims because it can deviate them from the teachings of Islam. Wan Mohamed, director jeneral of Jakim says that he is dissapointed with the attitudes of Muslims in the country who are easily influenced by foreign cultures to a point of affecting their faiths. 

Yoga practices may have derived from hinduism, however yoga has many forms. Many of which offered at health clubs are altered yoga to promote healthier living and a form of non strenous exercise which is helpful for preserving the body's agility as well as reduce asthma and heart related diseases. In other words, it is just another form of exercise!

I find it ridiculous to dig so deep in shit because there are bigger issues which should be addressed when it comes to muslim's health and practises. In the workshop i attended this weekend, there were statistics of HIV positive reported cases for year 2007. Out of 80,947 new reported cases, 34,000 were Malays, 19 thousand chinese, 11 thousand indian and the rest were marked no data ( due to the clients discretion of keeping their race anonymous). Surely the prevalence of contracting HIV is more of a bigger issue compared to practising Yoga. Yet we focus on redundant issues and make a big hoo hah about something which is ridiculously insignificant. 

Story 2

New fuel rebate system next year shows an increase in subsidy. For cars which are up to 2500cc, a rebate of RM650 will be awarded per year. Motorcycles with the capacity of up to 250cc will be awarded rm150 per year. A barrel of crude fuel is now priced at USD 65 compared to a few months ago, during our fuel price surge where a barrel costed USD76.44. Even so, Malaysian Fuel prices will see a decrease by next year only and it will not drop below RM1.92 because it is considered a reasonable price.

A rebate system should be able to subsidise efficiently for the poorer group, rather than make the rich richer. If a person can afford a 2500cc private vehicle, i dare say he or she is NOT making ends meet. What is the point of a rebate system if it cannot efficiently reduce the lower income group's needs?

We focus so much on how much is the appropriate amount to charge for fuel price. What about the fact that Malaysia is an Oil producing nation. When the price for fuel rose globally, we did not waste time and raise our prices by an alarming 41 percent. Now that the price has dropped back to what if was, we take our own sweet time to decrease the price. 

Story 3

The price of Avgas ( aviation fuel) has raise by 54% and is higher than in Singapore or Thailand. Flying students and owners of private jets are aghast by the raise of price. For an Aviation student, they will have to spend a good RM70,000 extra on fuel to complete their piloting course. 

Petronas has a monopoly on Avgas and yet the prices are rising. Singapore's Avgas's price dropped 3 months ago in fact. We promise the rakyat to drop fuel prices, but we raise aviation fuel prices. A robin hood situation i presume? Question is, how ethical was Robin Hood?